Lip Service

I wonder if HIM talks about me.  Did he tell his parents about me when he was home?  Has he said anything to his grandparents about me?  What does he tell his friends?  Or does he?  Because I have started to say we are dating when people inquire.  It feels weird to say even though I think its an accurate description of the situation.  

We went on a date Friday night and had a good time - Indian food and then a movie.  It was just the two of us sitting down to enjoy a movie without the usual posse for the first time.  It was nice to have something new.  Then Mike came home in the middle and had to make a big deal about the fact the HIM had his arm around me and I was leaning into HIM.  Grow up.  Mike has been acting weird with me ever since Rich and I picked up again.  I don't want to think too much about it, but it's like he's trying to rub his most recent hook-up in my face for some reason.  I'm not insinuating anything by saying that except that I think our dating makes him feel really weird - I guess.   

Things have been great, though not at all like any relationship I've had thus far.  I think we are very good at not singling each other out in group situations which is nice.  But when we are together, just the two of us, I feel...really happy.  It should be harder to describe than that, but it's just happiness.  Such a departure from the mixed-up feelings and ups and downs I have gotten used to.  You know, its funny how sometimes you can convince yourself that you have done too many stupid things and messed up too many times to deserve something better than good.  I've always worried that I have deviated too much from my path in life to be able to have the righteous man promised to me in my PB. 

 Not saying this is it, that the road ends with this one - But maybe I hope so.